Sunday, December 16, 2007


you know something i really wish i can turn back time and relive my life from secondary 4 to now another 1 million times before i go into j2.this is because from the time i enter j2, my life will whiz by so quickly i will not have time to think about the times i enjoy in the past.

i really think i am wasting my life away this holidays. i must be one of the few slackers who did nothing productive this holidays. 5 weeks of rotting in china has been continued by more rotting at home. i am so lazy that i dont even want to go out with my family. my attempts to do homework are all half-hearted and i at the rate i am going i will never finish my homework. people around me all have done something useful this holidays such as going for attachments or going for OCIP/immersion trips etc and the only thing i can say i achieved is watching finish 297 episodes of dragonball =.=

when wang guan was telling me on what he wants to do in the future and what he wants to study, i do not even know what to reply him when he ask me what i want to study. in fact i am really impressed by what he wants to achieve and everything. he even has his ideal job in his mind. my gosh i have no goals in life now. so what if i get 5 As in A levels if i do not know what i want to study. i would be better off bumming now and quitting school and trying to make ends meet by working as a cleaner or something. no skills or education required.

haiz really dont know what the fuck is going on with me these few days. i keep thinking that my life has no purpose. zzz. i sort of know what i want my life to be like in the future but without knowing what i want to be i think its just useless. i want to study medicine but its difficult to get in and i need to waste 10 years of my life studying if i ever want to earn a reasonable salary and be a somebody. i cant even survive another year of intense studying let alone 10. i think i might be interested in aerospace engineering but with taking physics being the biggest mistake in my jc life, i cant see how i can excel in studying that. i want to travel around the world but i cant think of any job that pays well and allows me to travel around except being a pilot and my dad is not exactly very supportive of this idea. my childhood ambition of being a lawyer is also way out. i cant even piece a proper english or chinese sentence together now. this is very shocking cause i always consider myself to be relatively fluent in both my languages. i dont know why this is happening. i can just join the people who speak neither english or chinese but a mix of both broken of course.

well the good news is i still have around 1 year to know what i want to do and also 1 mroe year to achieve something in VJC. i should start reading more to improve my chinese and english.

on a really random side note welcome back javier!

Twistin' at 1:20 AM